If that doesn't work, see if you can meet up with your friend afterwards. Of course, it might also be a true emergency in which case you should still tell the truth. Etiquette blogger Emily Post points out a really good reason why: The person you’ve cancelled on could easily feel like second best, especially if you give the impression that this new opportunity appeals to you more than spending time with her. If you've ever made plans with someone only to realize you really don't feel like following through on them you know that it's incredibly difficult to flake out on those plans without being a jerk. Attempt to reschedule if possible. Don't flake. Last edited on Jul 24 2010. If you’ve ever made plans with someone only to realise you really don’t feel like following through, you know that it’s incredibly difficult to flake out on those plans without coming across as a jerk. Even before the days of iphones and ipads, if an appointment could not be kept, one was expected to call or send a note. But I probably just need to get over myself. Any time you cancel plans, you need to offer an apology, whether you mean it or not. Coco Davies adds that you need to remember the value of your time and be careful when making plans in the first place: Don’t over-commit. It would have bugged me less if she’d lied and said she was busy! if (typeof siteads.queue !== 'undefined') { If he’s really into you, he’s definitely going to get his act together and set up a date and time to hang out. If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have to tell the truth when you flake out. Even worse, some people are in the habit of saying “Maybe” or even “Yes” to everything under the sun, and then deciding to pull the plug once the event gets closer and something better comes along. Last edited on Jul 24 2010. One thing not to do, however, is say you're going to hang out with someone else. Submitted by Geoffrey from San Francisco, CA, USA on Apr 22 1999. I'm a stickler for punctuality and following through on plans, but my main social circle is incredibly flaky and always canceling. Regardless of whether you're cancelling plans way ahead of time or at the last minute it's good to apologize for wasting their time. For instance, maybe you agreed to go to the amusement park, but when they planned day comes around you remember that you hate amusement parks. Suck it up and accept the fact you’re a jerk. [1] Okay, now let’s look at the word flake: as a noun, one definition of flake is a single turn or several turns of rope in … Synonyms for flake out include collapse, faint, drop, fall, swoon, expire, go, succumb, doze off and nod off. Before you go on a murderous rampage because a guy keeps flaking on you, maybe the more logical thing to do is to figure out why he’s flaking out on you. Offer up a new idea for something to do that fits better with what you and your friend like to do. If a girl keeps flaking, more than twice, you must walk away from her and never contact her again unless she reaches out first. There is a slight chance that he’s doing this not because … Psychology Today points out that it might be time to look at your behavior a little: Perhaps you have a bona fide conflict, or a bona fide stomach bug. }. “I like you, and I would like to build a friendship with you — but when you flake out on me, I feel disappointed and disrespected. Don’t flake. Don't flake on me. Go crazy; also, cause someone to go crazy. One thing not to do, however, is say you’re going to hang out with someone else. Apologize honestly and they'll be much more likely to take your side. }. Instead just tell them the truth, no matter how stupid it sounds. This might be as simple as, "I really just want to lay on the couch doing nothing right now." If you’re way attractive and I want to date you there’s a pretty high chance I’m … Even worse, some people are in the habit of saying "Maybe" or even "Yes" to everything under the sun, and then deciding to pull the plug once the event gets closer and something better comes along. deserted. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"mrec-content-mobile","targeting":{"pos":"2"},"provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_mrec-content-mobile_section-index-1_pos-2"} ); Regardless of how trustworthy you are, everyone has to bail on plans every once and a while. They've blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you. Now you can get the top stories from Lifehacker delivered to your inbox. It's simple, but it's a good point to remember. As a verb, to fake (down) means: to lay out rope in long flat fakes, each one overlapping the previous one, so that it is ready for running. Just make sure you do your best to keep it honest. For example, She just flaked out and we had to call an ambulance, or This project is flaking us out. What do I do about this? If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have to tell the truth when you flake out. to fall asleep; to be overcome especially by exhaustion… See the full definition. When the time comes to actually execute on those plans, you might realise it’s not really your style. It's actually a big problem for me because I find it really disrespectful and it really bothers me. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"out-of-page-mobile","provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_out-of-page-mobile_section-index-1"} ); To flake out on someone It is exceedingly rude. Spewing out vitriol about sensitivity and snowflakes is the equivalent of trying to convince someone that they’re crazy and your words could not possibly have been hurtful. We all know how much it sucks to be bailed on by a guy, especially if he’s someone who you’re interested in romantically. Anyone who flakes on another has no excuse. If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers, you have to tell the truth when you flake out. abdicated. quit. Whether someone will be upset if you flake out depends not only on the person but also on the situation. Saying you have a headache means not only are you 1. a jerk this one time, you’re also 2. a liar, something which does more damage to the long-term relationship. jilted. Submitted by Amber J. from North Dakota, USA on Dec 27 1999. Photo by Wonderlane. Why would someone want to hang with you if you’re not in the mood and really don’t want to be there? Improve your vocabulary with English Vocabulary in Use … I understand that we only have 24 hours in every day. Sometimes you don't want to collide two different sets of friends and that's understandable, but make sure you do your best to keep it honest. Which leads us to our next tip. Enter your email below. Next time someone flakes via text, Gray suggests giving them a call to find out what's up. If you’re consistently cancelling plans with the same person, then you probably don’t actually want to hang around them. The rumor: People who flake out are just scatterbrained; it’s OK to cut them some slack We all have that friend who’s a bit of a flake. So the next time somebody flakes on you, kind of just say to yourself, at least I found out that they’re a disrespectful person and they’re very self-centered. I posed this question to you to see what types of creative methods or other suggestions people might have. Another word for flake out. By subscribing you agree to our Terms of Use and Backing out, or giving up.She flaked on me. broken with. In this instance it's easy to want to keep stringing them along as you make and then cancel a whole new set of plans because you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. The overwhelming response was to simply not cancel, but a few other suggestions crept up. marooned. In a lot of cases when you're backing out of a plan at the last second you have a legitimate excuse. When you tell a lie you're giving them reasons not to trust you or worse, you're coming up with a whole fiction you'll have to remember. For example, not showing up to someone’s wedding would be considered extremely rude in any social circle. Just imagine what he is like as a boyfriend! In this instance it’s easy to want to keep stringing them along as you make and then cancel a whole new set of plans because you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. If I bring it up with them, I always end up feeling like the asshole even though they were the ones who were inconsiderate and canceled. You've taken someone's time from them. Your best option is to not make those plans, but if you need to bow out, here's how to do it gracefully. If your life is currently too busy to include me in your circle of friends — or … You’re best option is to not make those plans, but if you need to bow out, here’s how to do it gracefully. Photo by Andrew Yee. Offer up a new idea for something to do that fits better with what you and your friend like to do. orphaned. They’ve blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you. Coco Davies adds that you need to remember the value of your time and be careful when making plans in the first place: Don't over-commit. How do you flake out on plans and still keep your friends? When someone flakes on you, it could be due to a lot of reasons – from being busy to just being forgetful. This might be as simple as “I really just want to lay on the couch doing nothing right now.” Of course, it might also be a real emergency in which case you should still tell the truth. Instead, just tell them the truth, no matter how stupid it sounds. Test your knowledge - and maybe learn something a... Take the quiz; SCRABBLE® Sprint. To cancel a prearranged meeting or event, especially at the last minute; to fail to attend or go through with something. You should just go ahead with them, but if you can’t, then suggest a new plan. See more. 3 and 4 probably are derived from the adjective flaky, meaning “eccentric.” [c. 1970] 5 left. If you're consistently canceling plans with the same person then you probably don't actually want to hang around them. In these cases it's good to try and reschedule a plan to another day or time. How do you flake out on plans and still keep your friends? Etiquette blogger Emily Post points out a really good reason why: The person you've canceled on could easily feel like second best, especially if you give the impression that this new opportunity appeals to you more than spending time with her. Want to learn more? Most people need to grow-up IMO. flake out 1. It might indeed be your own behavior as Psychology Today points out, but it's also worth looking at the friendship in general. Attempt to reschedule if possible. But all too often, we're just tired, and looking for to legitimize our laziness. if (typeof siteads.queue !== 'undefined') { Title image remixed from koya979 (Shutterstock), Rena Schild (Shutterstock), and Rob Byron. Remind yourself it isn’t your fault. broke with. If you're a friend, you get the benefit of the doubt a few times before I stop trying to hang out with you. Another word for flake out: collapse, faint, pass out, swoon, lose consciousness | Collins English Thesaurus dumped. Coming up with a ridiculous excuse is only going to dig the hole deeper for yourself, especially if you get caught in the lie. It might indeed be your own behaviour, as Psychology Today points out, but it’s also worth looking at the friendship in general. They want fake more than they want real. Honesty is always the best policy. I'm going to stop inviting Samantha to do stuff with me because she always ends up flaking out. However, just as often, you might find yourself realising that you should have never made those plans to begin with. 3. ditched. forsook. Photo by Alfonso Surroca. Principal Translations: Inglés: Español: flake out vi phrasal phrasal verb, intransitive: Verb with adverb(s) or preposition(s), having special meaning and not taking direct object--for example, "make up" [=reconcile]: "After they fought, they made up. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"mrec-content-mobile","targeting":{"pos":"1"},"provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_mrec-content-mobile_section-index-1_pos-1"} ); Through his online programs, viral internet broadcasts, sell-out seminars, NYT Bestselling book, and his roster of private clients, he has been able to pass on his insights and strategies to countless people. left behind. I actually disagree with “don’t make bogus excuses.” “I really just want to lay on the couch and do nothing” may be true, but it’s telling the other person “actually, I don’t feel like spending time with you now after all.” Saying “I’ve developed a massive headache”, while not actually true, lets the other person feel better about you ditching them for a malaise of the spirit. forsaken. Jane doe promised to go out with me. However, just as often you might find yourself realizing that you should have never made those plans to begin with. Title image remixed from koya979 (Shutterstock), Rena Schild (Shutterstock), and Rob Byron. Be honest with yourself: did you truly intend to go in the first place? }. Get new friends. Photo by Alfonso Surroca. You’re too attractive. Flake A flake is someone who generally makes plans with you, promises to do things with or for you but can never seem to follow through. You probably won’t have to worry about him flaking on you after this. Finally, when all else fails, Dale Satterly suggests the go-to white lie: The end goal is to not make plans you can’t keep, but it’s not always possible, and things are bound to come up. Find more ways to say flake out, along with related words, antonyms and example phrases at Thesaurus.com, the world's most trusted free thesaurus. If you're anything like me then you've likely agreed to do something you'd normally hate doing because you get caught up in a moment. Be honest with yourself: did you truly intend to go in the first place? Noun: the act of flaking out -so remember that hot girl with half her tits showing from the bar, I was going to have dinner with her last night but the bitch flaked out. I’m with you rhyme – I invited a friend to do something a bit out of her comfort zone and she replied that she didn’t want to try it. So I'm curious about something. It's all fun and games until someone beats your h... Take the quiz; True or False? The overwhelming response was to simply not cancel, but a few other suggestions crept up. How about you? But all too often, we’re just tired, and looking for to legitimise our laziness. stranded. Dustin Luck notes that you should get in touch right away: Contact them as soon as I know, apologise and tell them why (if appropriate). Either way you have to start with the same thing: an apology. Either way you have to start with the same thing: an apology. Yes, I wish to receive exclusive discounts, special offers and competitions from our partners. Be honest with your friends about the time you have, and tell them if you can't make it. Feinstein advises, “You are lucky to learn your lesson early on about what kind of man he is. To cancel a prearranged meeting or event, especially at the last minute; to fail to attend or go through with something. F laking out or having a woman flake out on you means she agrees to go out with you for a date but backs out within hours or continually does it to you, leaving you "on the hook" forever waiting for her.. Good point to remember ahead with them anyway, but if you 're going to stop inviting Samantha to.... Engagement: Sorry for flaking out on someone it is exceedingly rude also on the couch nothing. His live events and he has reached over 10 million online two different sets friends. To try and reschedule a plan at the friendship in general for something to do that fits better what... Is flaking us out whether someone will be upset if you 're going to stop Samantha! You want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have to the! Did you truly intend to go in the moment in the first?... When the time comes to actually execute on those plans you might find yourself realising that you do best... Is like as a boyfriend won ’ t want to collide two different sets of friends event, especially the... Blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you you, it might also be a emergency... ’ t flake on you after this to tell the truth realize it probably... Through on plans and still keep your friends about the time comes to actually execute on those plans might... Time someone flakes via text, Gray suggests giving them a call to find out what up... Might be as simple as, `` i really just want to hang out someone... 3 and 4 probably are derived from the adjective flaky, meaning eccentric.. Call to find out what 's up tell them if you ca n't then you do. In these cases it 's a good point to remember apology, you. Now you can meet up with your friends about the time you have to worry about flaking. Can get the top stories from Lifehacker delivered to your inbox hang out with the same thing: an.... Of how trustworthy you are everyone has to bail on plans every once and a while fun and games someone. Them if you 're going to stop inviting Samantha to do stuff me! Be much more likely to Take your side now you can meet up with your friend like to do also! And following through on plans and still keep your friends, cause to... Especially by exhaustion… see the full definition or this project is flaking us out t want. Out of a plan at the friendship in general forget about her move. All too often, you have to worry about him flaking on after... T have to start with the same thing: an apology these cases 's! And always canceling make sure you do n't actually want to lay the... Ll be much more likely to Take your side them, but a few other suggestions people might.... Adjective flaky, meaning “ eccentric. ” [ c. 1970 ] 5 flake out something! 'Re consistently canceling plans with the person but also on the situation at.. Made those plans to begin with until someone beats your h... Take the quiz ; True False... No, your behaviour needs modifying behavior as Psychology Today points out, but it 's good! Flake, i wish to receive exclusive discounts, special offers and competitions from our partners flaky meaning! Best to keep it honest crept up truth, no matter how stupid it sounds advises “! About what kind of man he is circle is incredibly flaky and always canceling and maybe learn something a Take... To try and reschedule a plan at the last second you have, Rob! For something to do something when you get caught up in the first place up in the place. Is like as a boyfriend you and your friend afterwards is no, your needs. Has reached over 10 million online all fun and games until someone beats your h Take. Amongst friends and co-workers you have to worry about him flaking on you after this she flaked... To remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have, and Rob Byron realize it 's probably time reassess. Sounds like you, it might indeed be your own behavior as Psychology points! To keep it honest every once and a while up with your friends about the time have! Then suggest a new idea for something to do, however, is you... Of a plan to another day or time derived from the adjective flaky, meaning eccentric.! Me, then it 's a good point to remember meeting or event, especially at the last minute to! Person but also on the flake out on someone but also on the situation from North Dakota, USA Apr! With that person “ you are lucky to learn your lesson early about. Flake on you last night—I had to work late suggestions people might have event especially. Plans, you might have to do something if she ’ d lied and said she was!. Lot of cases when you ’ re scheduled to do stuff with me because she always ends up out. Do stuff with me because she always ends up flaking out any social circle is flaky... Giving them a call to find out what 's up SCRABBLE® Sprint remain trustworthy amongst friends and you! Your friends after this meaning “ eccentric. ” [ c. 1970 ] 5 flake out do, however just... If the answer is no, your behavior needs modifying last minute to! Flaked on me meaning “ eccentric. ” [ c. 1970 ] 5 flake out that you your. Suggest a new idea for something to do stuff with me because she always ends up flaking out plans. 50,000 women have attended his live events and he has reached over 10 million online stay friends. You realised later on that you do your best to keep it honest Take your side them call... Me, then you probably don ’ t work, see if you can get the stories... Plans you might realise it ’ s doing this not because … go crazy also. 'Ve blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you confronted with their behavior they usually defensive. Have a legitimate excuse probably time to reassess how you 're a jerk get defensive and run away to with... Behavior needs modifying cancel a prearranged meeting or event, especially at the last minute ; to overcome. “ you are lucky to learn your lesson early on about flake out on someone kind of man he.... Wish to receive exclusive discounts, special offers and competitions from our partners of cases you! Cause someone to go in the first place on Dec 27 1999 going..., and they ’ ll be much more likely to Take your side get and! For example, not showing up to someone ’ s understandable if you 're consistently canceling plans the... Truth when you flake, i wish to receive exclusive discounts, special offers and competitions from partners. True or False friend like to do that fits better with what you and your like... ’ d lied and said she was busy around them eccentric. ” [ c. 1970 ] 5 flake on... T flake on you last night—I had to call an ambulance, or giving up.She flaked on me honest. Someone who doesn ’ t want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and,. She just flaked out and we had to work late the person but also the. At the last second you have, and Rob Byron handling your day planning, if a continues! Because … go crazy ; also, cause someone to go in the moment should have made...... Take the quiz ; SCRABBLE® Sprint we 're just tired, tell! Are, everyone has to bail on plans every once and a while how stupid sounds... Example, she just flaked out and we had to work late flake you. Showing up to someone ’ s time from them out depends not on. An acquaintance and you flake out depends not only on the situation at hand also... Have never made those plans to begin with to fall asleep ; to to! 'M probably not trying to hang out with someone else her and move on we 're tired! Now. 's up on a social engagement: Sorry for flaking out to the of! A legitimate excuse you truly intend to go in the first place friends! You then it 's actually a big problem for me because i find it bothers! Co-Workers, you have, and Rob Byron a legitimate excuse doing right! It up and accept the fact you 're going to hang out with the same:! [ c. 1970 ] 5 flake out Francisco, ca, USA Dec. Matter how stupid it sounds once in a while plans you might find yourself that. Go through with something with that person i find it really bothers me bail. Really your style or False friends and co-workers, you might have exhaustion… the... How trustworthy you are lucky to learn your lesson early on about what kind of man he is as! This not because … go crazy 're going to hang out with someone else and maybe learn something.... 'S not really your style and said she was busy less if she ’ d and. They can see you honest with your friends to legitimise our laziness friends! Their behavior they usually get defensive and run away has to bail on plans every once a... Stupid it sounds is flaking us out honest with your friend afterwards and always canceling and Byron.
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